I think history shows us it's delivered only folly.

I happen to agree with you, regarding the safeguards of a lifetime committed monogamy. I've known too many people who claimed that polyamory, “open relationships”, etc. would work out fine, and only end up in a world of hurt.

And there is no prohibition on men writing about women's issues. But it's pretty unlikely that a woman would write a post like the above, and there are good reasons besides that “women are mistaken”.

To be honest, I don't think that women are all that interested in “sex without consequences”. That is a male fantasy. There is a reason that it's mainly men in the Church who have problems with lust, pornography addiction, and so on. And men already have sex without consequences. By stigmatizing the outcome, blaming it on “wanton” or “cowardly” women, they shift the blame to the weaker sex. It's a privilege of being powerful.

Most women in college are far more concerned about things that no man has to worry about. Like, how to avoid being date-raped, drugged with roofies, violently attacked by a rejected man, stalked, emotionally manipulated into doing things that aren't healthy, and so on.

We know that these unhealthy relationships are usually initiated by the males. So why don't the women stand up for themselves? Because we teach little girls that they have to be demure, quiet, submit to others, don't rock the boat. And we teach them that boys are permitted to be violent, boys can take what they want, fight. We teach them that a woman who wants to be alone is pathological, while a man who wants to be alone is just focused on his career. By the time they get to college, they have absolutely no practice at defending themselves. Lecturing them about being wanton or cowardly doesn't help; it just compounds the problem.

I'm sure you know enough to know that I'm not suggesting that all pro-choicers are “wanton libertines”. I am speculating, however, that an abortion culture, coupled hand in hand with the widespread use of contraceptives, makes it very easy for people to think that casual sex is the norm. Further more, that casual sex has no consequences because: 1) contraception lowers the probability of unwanted pregnancy/spread of STD/STIs, and; 2) abortion is there when things go wrong with plan A.

Hence, the title of my post “sex without consequences” was to reflect this type of mindset in culture – a kind of utopian goal.

While the widespread availability of the contraceptive pill in the 60s didn't start what we know as the sexual revolution, it is my view that it certainly contributed to its explosion from the mid to late 60s (after it became accessible to non-married women).

I would disagree that men can't write about such issues: consequences from sexual unions, whether you're female or male, do impact wider society – both by social impacts (i.e. teen pregnancies) and economical impacts (I think in 2000 the lifetime medical costs of 15-26 year olds to treat venereal diseases was estimated at $6.5 billion US). Men and women make up society – therefore either sex are entitled to discuss what impacts them.

There are of course positive consequences to sexual unions. My contention is that the positive consequences of sex are mostly found (as a general rule) within the safe guards of lifetime, committed monogamy while the negative consequences are found (as a general rule) in other forms of copulation.

It's like telling the rape victim that she “wanted it”, or that she “didn't fight back hard enough”. Yeah, I know you wouldn't do that in the case of rape, but then you need to ask yourself why you're doing it in the case of the other high-pressure situations women get put into at college.

It's kind of telling that we have men writing blog posts about what women want, and then asking “Am I right, ladies?” Yeah, right, all the ladies who aren't wanton libertines and cowards will pipe right up. Personally, I would recommend finding a female who is speaking up about female issues and link to her, since it's just not credible in this form.

http://kateharding.net/2009/10/08/guest-blogger…